REST AND RELAXATION

The time has come for WATWHEELS to leave the team for a lil rest and relaxation back to the world. So these 4 phases of preparation will soon pay off. Since i`m being forced to be first i am setting the tone for my fellow MUNGADAIS to follow. My journey back to the world will be safe as my fellow team will continue to advise the local nationals. So MUNGADAIS have a MERRY CHRISTMAS AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR cause i will cause HENNESEY and COKE ain`t no joke. WATWHEEELS OUT.

The Range: Part Deux

Attacking the Course

In a violent but controlled manner

Gun Runners' shooting skills

The .50 cal singing

Another great day for the Mungadai, range time + free bullets = great day! And by free bullets I mean paid for by the U.S. taxpayers, so thanks for the Christmas present. Our second range was similar to the first although at a different site. Very basic accommodations and any targets you want to shoot you have to bring with. We built on to the skills from the first range with everyone getting plenty of trigger time with our rifles, pistols and also incorporated an assault course. Once everyone went through the assault course we negotiated it again except this time with our non firing hand on the trigger making the simplest task of a magazine change into a complex effort. After that we brought an MRAP around and rotated everyone through firing the M2 .50 caliber machine gun. Music to my ears.

Although there is no range yet scheduled for the immediate future we have plenty of ammunition set aside for one. Once again, thanks for the bullets!

Gunrunner Indeed...

I believe that Gunrunner's post on chai consumption and the wonders worked by Max Lumber with a ball peen hammer and a cold chisel constitute the first instance of someone unilaterally establishing his own callsign. Did I miss it? Has anybody heard a net call for Gunrunner going out?

That's all right, dude. You can call yourself Gunrunner, Leadslinger, Widder-maker, whatever floats your boat...you'll always be Hello Kitty to us.

Still Waiting in Ambush

I just got back from the nightly ops meet, and looked in on some of the Mungadai playing bones. This most definitely is not "the day of Buddha." Heh.

Congratulations to the Marlboro Man...

On his re-enlistment in the US Army. For administrative reasons, we had little warning that we would execute the re-enlistment today. I think I saw the words "for the rest of your natural life" in the contract.

To celebrate, the Mungadai all pitched in to buy the Marlboro Man a special remembrance of this special day...a shower scruntchy.

The Day of Buddha

I would like to take this time to defend myself and the love for the pastime of “bones”. Not winning is a façade and a simple way for me to build the confidence of my fellow teammates. I am strategically placing myself for the winners chair when it counts. As of right now, this time has yet to come. I know for a fact I have Top sleepless at night almost attune to my little scheme. For those that play “bones”, be wary because the day of Buddha will come. The reckoning of numbers and complexity of my skill will spew terror in the simple minds of our little fraternity of dominos.

Gross violation of Man Laws

Some may take offense to this, but it’s a topic that has irked me for some time now and the opportunity has presented itself for me to vent. Yeah, me getting wound up about something, I know. This morning while enjoying my second pot of coffee and my umpteenth morning cigarette I saw a “guy” walking across the parking lot with his index finger and thumb daintily pinching the little yarn loop that’s connected to a pink shower scrunchy.
I talked to Shellbird about this (for the record she advised against going forth with this) and she said, “It exfoliates the skin” where in turn I replied, “my point exactly!” When did this become important? Do you also have a batch of scented candles to go along with it? If exfoliation is a concern of yours and you have in your possession a “shower scrunchy” or “puff”, as I’m told they are also called, ask yourself this. If they were meant for men to use would they be called that? If you need to get the dirt off go ahead and get yourself a hard bristled brush and leave the female bath products alone.
Dirt isn’t brave enough to get on Chuck Norris, but if it were, he would take it off with a belt sander.

What Keeps Us Busy

Families may wonder what keeps the Mungadai busy when we are not advising our INP counterparts. First, there is one activity that all Mungadai participate in, drinking chai (aka tea) with our counterparts. Iraqis posses a craving for the beverage on the scale of an addiction, and the chai is as sweet as you can find in an Georgia roadside dinner. No matter the time of day or location Mungadai can be certain that chai will be served. In fact, the Mungadai are so concerned with the sugar content of the chai (1 part chai to 2 parts sugar) that we are certain that we will have diabetes when we redeploy.

One Mungadai has kept himself busy by modifying every piece of equipment that can be taken apart. Max Wood has the uncanny ability to look at a perfectly functional piece of Army equipment and find a way to "make it better". He is constantly taking something apart and modifying to the "Max". Unfortunately, when he is finished, the equipment is generally held together with zip ties and a couple rolls of duct tape. For the record, Max Wood is not allowed near my truck for fear of "modifications". In addition to equipment modifications, Max Wood has completed a number of barracks improvement projects. He has built most of the furniture for our rooms and has roped in The Marlboro Man and Wheels to help him. Max Wood's biggest triumph was putting in a light over the steps that lead into our barracks.

The game "Bones" or Dominoes is a nightly event for some of the Mungadai. The primary players are Top, Wheels, Max Wood (when he isn't taking something apart), Buddha, and the Kid. I for one do not know how to play "Bones" but if I decide to learn I know who I will not ask to teach me. According to the score board Buddha has yet to win a single game. I feel confident that a win is in his future.

Of course the most important pastime is keeping in touch with our loved ones at home. We speak often of our families and share gifts sent to us from home. We all thank you for your support and taking care of the home front.

A day at the Range: Part 1

Show me your KILL face

Uhmm... prone UN supported

The Mungadai recently had a day away from the normal grind and went to the small arms range. Any day you get paid to go fire weapons with free bullets is a good day. And fire weapons we did, almost 500 rounds per Mungadai! We started off with the M4 rifle and then fired our M9 9mm pistols. Once that was complete we alternated between them both with transition drills. Fire a controlled pair with your rifle and going to a controlled pair with your pistol etc..., good stuff. Once that was complete we climbed onto our MRAPs to fire the M240B 7.62mm machine gun mounted on top at the gunners station. What could be better? Tank live fire, but in the mean time I guess machine guns will have to fill the void.

We have another range scheduled soon so stay tuned for "The Range part 2".

Relentless

We all know that Mungadai and knives go together like peanut butter and jelly, peas and carrots, blood and guts...
And no one makes a better knife than Relentless.
So we'd like to congratulate Relentless Knives on Hollywood's selection of the Relentless M4X as the blade-of-choice for Frank Castle in the new Punisher movie.
The Mungadai have a great affinity for The Punisher; he adheres to exacting standards, asks no less of anyone else than he would ask of himself, and metes out the appropriate measure of justice to those members of society who cannot or will not follow the basic precepts of the social contract.
If you go to the Relentless Knives ENewsletter, you'll see some friends of Relentless patrolling the streets of Mosul.

PS-For all the Mungababes out there, nothing says "I love you, Poopsie" like a Relentless Knife. It's the gift that keeps on giving...to Al Qaeda, to the Mahdi Army, to the Badr Corps, to the Quds Force...

Beuller? Anyone? Beuller?

I'm thinking we need a good post for the Fam Damily's. And I'm thinking I'm not going to do it. I'm thinking some enterprising Mungadai warrior is going to post...say...something about our range this week. And I think that that particular Mungadai is...wait for it...The Marlboro Man. So, get to work, Smokestack.